Friday, July 10, 2009

Scooter For My Wife: The Responses

As of 9:00 this evening, there were almost 300 hits on my ad. That's 298 hits in about 32 hours, or 9.3 clicks per hour. Go me!

It didn't generate nearly the response that I was hoping for (i.e. a free scooter), however I did get some feedback.

Overwhelmingly, the emails I received were positive in nature. In fact, 66% of all emails were of the high-five variety.

Phil said:
"Great write-up - If I had a scooter to give away, you would have it for sure!
Thanks for the laugh"
Thanks Phil! I'll be sure to ask for more things that you don't have that you would give me otherwise in the future!

Jayne from Sympatico said:
"hehe! Good article. Good luck with that"
Aw, your half-hearted chuckle was all that I needed, but thanks for the compliment!

Todd said:
"Weh...this is glorious. Just thought I'd let you know.
I want a scooter, too..."
The most glowing review I received, Todd gets the Biggest Fan award. Congratulations Todd! Now go write your own ad, but you better not get a scooter for free before my wife.

Finally, Lady said:
"haha this add made me laugh! :))"
Lady is the biggest geek to write me. Only huge nerds are amused by math. To further emphasize how big a nerd she is, her emoticon is a smiling Alien (get it? There are two mouths? haha!). Thanks Lady! (Wow, I feel like Jerry Lewis...)

But of course, not all correspondence was like this.

In fact, A Guy (who shall remain nameless for now, but I can't imagine that there are many A. Guy's living in the area) was the first person to respond to my deliciously worded ad:
"Buddy I don't know what your smoking, but you better stop soon..cause your babbling like a woman...so give the guy his money back for those cheap drugs you bought, cause whatever it did to your mind you got taken"
I believe what A is trying to tell me here is that he disapproves of my advertisement. I hope to become close friends with A in the near future. If he thinks that I wrote this while under the influence of cheap drugs, he MUST have access to awesome drugs. Then, when I have lured him into trusting me implicitly, I will turn him in to Crime Stoppers. Instead of reward money, I will ask for a scooter for my wife.

Finally, Duffieboy wrote me at least once, but quite possibly more than that. I'm also theorizing that A Guy was actually trying to write Duffieboy and got me by accident:
"My msg to you continued...
Life is what life is.. live it the best you can, be as happy as you can... and love each other as much as you can.... And the most important...Make sure to do everything you can to make each other as happy as you can...
You never know when either of you will die...don;t waste your life worrying.. live it."
Duffie, my response to you begins...
Something is what something is. Do something the best you can, and be as emotionally positive as you can, given the circumstances...
Duffie, that's what the old me would have said to you in a sarcastic and highly mocking tone of voice...but the new me, the me that your mind altering email changed me into, wants to do nothing more than connect with you spiritually and on a higher plane of existence...and maybe then slap the bejeepers out of you.
Uh, hello? I DO love my wife as much as I can AND I'm doing everything I can to make her happy! Did you not read my ad? I'm trying to get her a scooter! I'm helping to fulfill one of my wife's fondest wishes. What are YOU doing? Jerk.


If I get any more ads, I'll post 'em. I have an idea for the next one, still percolating and it will need some work. If I get a free scooter for my wife, I'll post a picture too!

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