Wednesday, April 4, 2012

I Chose Girls... I Think I Chose Well

This Kijiji ad was sent along to me by a co-worker.

ECS Jedi Training Camp (Summer Day Camp)
Date Listed 02-Apr-12
Last Edited 02-Apr-12
Event Date(s) 09-Jul-12 to 13-Jul-12
Event Time 08:30 to 16:30
Price $140.00
Address Fredericton, NB, Canada

"Adventure, excitement…a Jedi craves not these things…"
...But that’s what you’ll find at
East Coast Sabers Jedi Training Camp
July 9th-13th, 2012
8:30am-4:30pm
Odell Park Lodge
Join us in a Galaxy far, far away and take part in week of fun and games as you take the first steps to joining the ranks of the Jedi with East Coast Sabers. East Coast Sabers is a locally run club for Star Wars and Lightsaber enthusiasts.
Is the Force within you?
Beginners welcome…Masters wanted.
The Jedi are the noble, peacekeepers of the galaxy. Learn the ways of the Force and become a Jedi.
Learn about:
-The Star Wars universe.
-Lightsaber instruction
-Respect, teamwork and leadership
-Confidence, control and co-operation
-Exercise and health
…all in a fun and safe environment!
Limited spaces available so register now!!!
Cost -$140.00.
$120.00 if you register by June 1st
Family discount -2 or more children=15% off
For more information or to register contact us

Notice that he waited until April 2 to post this - so it's not an April Fool's joke.

Two co-workers asked if this was me. It is not, and I'm both flattered and concerned that I was the guy they thought of. I'm not that big of a Star Wars fan. I mean, I really enjoyed Star Wars, but it's not like I can quote them from star to finish. I reserve that particular skill for Robocop, The American President, and Quest For the Holy Grail, which make an odd sort of trilogy.

Now, there's no way that I'm going to make fun of this guy - he is a Jedi, and you don't screw around with a Jedi - but I can't help but think that I was one girlfriend away from becoming this guy. I'm not suggesting that this Jedi from just outside Fredericton, NB doesn't have skills with the ladies ("I am the droid you are looking for"), I'm just saying that I might be this guy if I hadn't decided that I was a little more interested in finding out how to get near a bra in its natural environment than watching the Trilogy again (because there's the Trilogy and then there are the Prequels, and that's how they shall be separated).

Okay, I might be a little bit of a fanboy.

If I hadn't been able to convince that first girl to accept that first date (even though it was kind of a mercy date because her best friend was dating my best friend and I think we were both kind of feeling left out), I could have headed down this path.*

On the other hand, if I could send a message back to my teenage self, it would be shower more often. Really, I wasn't joking about how greasy I was. It was like being a human piece of bacon, only without the delicious flavour. But if I could send TWO messages to my teenage self, the second would be that eventually you will have a Lovely Wife that will give you practically unlimited bra access you'll ever want, so don't sweat it.

Jedi Training Dude, I salute you for following your ambition: instilling a love of the Star Wars universe in the souls of the youth of our provincial capital (hopefully we'll get more Yodas than Palpatines - high five if you get that and your loved ones have my condolences), while at the same time getting paid for it.  There are not many people that can say that.

You are truly living the dream in a way that I am not.

*As it turns out, my first girlfriend also moved to the Moncton area. She has a wonderful family and we keep meaning to invite them over for a barbecue. This summer, I swear. I owe her big time.

1 comment:

  1. Wow....
    Where to start. First of all, thank you...I think.
    I mean, that you took the time to post about me, Jedi Master Brad Doucette, is absolutely an honour, my amazingly gorgeous wife Maria will find this hilarious, and believe me, she is hot. We had already been married for a couple years before my "hobby" really surfaced and turned into a full-time (ok, part-time) job. Let's just say I never embraced the geek in me until after I secured the girl, lol.
    But now, I do what I love, I have alot of fun, I get to spend all my time with my two amazing boys...AND I GET PAID TO PLAY WITH LIGHTSABERS DUDE. COME ON...who wouldn't want this job?

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.