Thursday, September 29, 2016

What? MacGyver?

Thanks to Scott for telling me that this was happening.

I pulled up the commercial for the new MacGyver reboot and it looked like a glorious mess.  I couldn't even really see it that well, because it was on my phone in our breakroom, but I got the gist of it.  

I am not exactly a huge fanboy of the original series (though the fact that I have to call it "the original series" leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth), but I have fond memories.  I thought I would watch this new show, see what they thought was a suitable update of the MacGyver character, and write about it here.

I'm sure that there will be spoilers ahead, but I'm also guessing that if you're still reading this, you probably already have an opinion about this show.

Here we go!

Okay, I'm 12 seconds in and I've already paused it to write something down.

MacGyver in a tuxedo?  The only time that MacGyver was in a tuxedo, he was all antsy and looked like he needed to get out of it and back into his familiar leather jacket and blue jeans.  And what is with this car?  MacGyver's car never had gull-wing doors unless he made them.  I only know that's MacGyver because of the commercial - I probably would have made it further before stopping... maybe?

12 seconds. Wow.  Gotta keep an open mind about this.  

Here we go again.

Paused at 32 seconds.

Sigh.  Here's some character exposition so you know that this beautiful woman is super smart, but she's a sexy nerd and you can tell that because they're having sex on a computer keyboard!  Why is MacGyver doing this with his partner?  This has to be a record for shortest "will they/won't they" in television history.

70 seconds.  I need to stop doing this, or I'll never finish.

I just wanted to say that I forgot about CSI guy.  Holy crap, I just looked up CSI.  Did you know that it was on for 15 years?  Dang.  

I'm going to try to do the next part just as it comes to me without pausing.  Otherwise, I'll be here all night.

The voice over is killing me.

Wait, I have to pause here.  Was that a valet running in the background?  And he parked his own car?  What the?

Labels on everything?  OG MacGyver didn't have to label everything.  

If full handprint scanners can't protect against hacks, how on earth is Apple supposed to protect your phone with a thumb print?

I'm not even ten minutes into the show and I don't know if I can get any further.

OH SNAP! Vinnie Jones!  I'm back in!  And a... Ninja?  What?

...

Ugh.  halfway through.  Can I make it?  Oof I don't know.  This is like... the worst.

Finished it. And by that, I mean that I've finished watching it at about the 32 minute mark.  It's not very good.  At all.  Why did I do this?  

Honestly, they might as well have named this show the A-Team, it has that much to do with the original characters.  Or maybe Diff'rent Strokes.  Or maybe The Price Is Right.  

I'm going to bed.  Forget this happened.

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